Monday, March 30, 2015

BURNOUT???

I have been doing agility basically since 2003. Off and on with 3 different dogs who all had very different attitudes towards agility. I have had varying degrees of success and varying degrees of frustration. But I have never been at a point where I thought I could quit.

Molly was my first agility dog. We did agility because she was rambunctious and I needed an outlet for her energy. We started doing it for fun and did it off and on for several years often with long breaks due to illness/injuries on her part. We changed trainers and got caught up in the competitive side of agility. Molly didn't enter her first agility trial until she was around 7. Although she amassed many titles, she never loved it. She did it for me. In reality, I think she hated it. She has never once climbed the Aframe or dog walk in my agility yard since she retired. I forced her to do it and she did it for me because she loved me. Plus she loves a good car ride and was always up for a trip.

 
I deliberately adopted Marley for agility. She looked like a litttle Aussie as a puppy and I thought she would be a good agility candidate. I didn't count on the multitude of health problems that she would deal with. My little fluff ball turned into a Golden Retriever sized dog who stole my heart and soul. I tried to do everything right for Marley. I put her in obedience classes, worked with her and waited until our agility trainer said she could start agility classes. Unfortunately, Marley developed a dog reactivity issue and was often scolded and manhandled by the trainer and I didn't step in and stop it. I regret that I let another person who had no training in dog reactivity 'train' my dog. I often left class in tears and would cry all the way home. One day I finally had enough and I sought out a different trainer. It was with this trainer that we found our 'home'. She helped me immensely with Marley and helped me achieve so much with her. And I will always be grateful to her.

Unfortunately once the dog reactivity issue was under control, Marley was displaying rear end lameness and was diagnosed with bilateral hip dysplasia. I was completely devastated. All the dreams I had for her just died. I remember crying on the phone to my mom about Marley immediately after she was diasgnosed. Crying so hard, I could barely speak. Marley got put on pain meds and rested for weeks and then we tried agility again. She was able to continue. She was hit or miss in the competition ring. She either ran or walked. I never knew what dog I was taking to the start line. She stayed on pain meds her entire agility career and she frequently got pulled from trial for lameness. I never ran her injured.

We even worked on obedience and trialed both obedience and rally. She earned her Companion Dog (CD) title (the first All American Dog in Arkansas to do so) and 2 rally titles. I only did obedience and rally to prove people wrong about her. Marley is a good dog, she was just misunderstood and didn't get the proper training until I changed trainers. Despite her hips and the pain she was in, she earned a multitude of agility titles (including 2 QQ's) and is even the #1 AKC All American Dog in Arkansas. She is in the record books forever. No one can take that from us.

 
Marley has retired from agility and now has 2 new hips. I'm hoping by the end of the year, I will try her in some backyard agility and see if she's still interested in it. Due to all of Marley's health problems, we have spent alot of time together and I have shed many tears about her.  She needed me and I needed her. My best friend always tells me that I love Marley differently than I love my other dogs. And that is true. She is my soul dog.

Kalea-Kate or KK or Kate (as I often call her when running her) was also adopted to be an agility dog. I adopted her shortly after my mom died, I was trying to fill a void in my heart. She was in agility classes literally the week I brought her home at 14 weeks old. She was fearless and showed great potential. I told myself while I was training her, that I wouldn't push her into competition. But I did. She was in her first trial at 16 months. Even though she was just a baby, she stepped to the line and Q'd her first run and was earning titles by her second trial, I regret entering her that young. With all the early successes, I just kept pushing her.

 
She started having some issues. She refused to take any contact obstacles for several trials and would off course to the weave poles. That girl loves to weave! We worked through that and she quickly got through Novice and Open in AKC. USDAA standard took us awhile because she decided the table was optional and refused to lay down on it. The table continued to haunt us and now she refuses to even get on it at trials. She will get on it all day at my house and at training, but she refuses to table at a trial.

We are now at a stallmate. She can throw down some 6.5yps jumpers times and get awesome Gambles but she won't get on the table. She is frustrating me. I've been pulling her from the course when she refuses to table, but that isn't working. She literally runs up to the table, turns back to me and barks at me. Then she runs from me when I try to pick her up to remove her from the course. I often leave the standard ring furious and near tears. I don't understand how this little dog is so awesome in every other run, has great distance but refuses a simple table. I don't want to squealch her enthusiasm and speed, nor do I want to run/walk along beside her just to ensure a Q. I want her to RUN and be KK but to listen to me and follow my direction.

KK has awesome potential in agility. I get compliments all the time at trials on her ability and speed. She's a great little dog who happens to love agility.When I first started trailing with KK, my goal was for her to earn her ADCH and MACH while she was 3. That was a very realistic goal. She is actually fairly close to both right now, but I don't think that's going to happen and I really don't care anymore.

Agility just isn't fun anymore. I don't know if I've just lost the passion for it and just need a break or if I'm really done with agility. I just don't know. But I do know that life has happened. For those close to me, they know what that means. And life is pretty great right now.