I have been a nursing instructor for 14 of my 20 years as a
nurse. It was a rewarding job to an extent. I enjoyed teaching the students in
the classroom and clinical but the administrative requirements made the job
tedious. I was in charge of the pediatric course at a local school of nursing
for 11 of the 13 years I was there. I witnessed the program go through many
changes, some good, some bad. As time wore on, it was clear administration had
other ideas of what direction the school was headed and I was not going to be
part of it. Even though I always received great evaluations, I was going to be
removed from my course leader position, so the new administration could put in
their minion. A minion that would do any do anything to get higher up in
administration. After hearing of the plan administration had ‘secretly’ come up
with, I made a life changing decision. I quit my job without notice. I know it
wasn’t very professional but I knew if I gave notice, administration would
harass me for those two weeks.
Within 15 minutes of putting in my resignation, the minion
moved into my office and was singing in the hallways. She also made time to
make up a rumor about me. A very good one in fact. She said I had gotten fired
for having an inappropriate relationship with a student and I got escorted off
the property. The rumor was very hurtful and could have been very detrimental to
my professional life. I’m sure her fellow church members at a large Baptist church
located on a major interstate where she
regularly attends, would be pleased to know she sets such a good example of
Christianity. Her behavior, professing she is such a great Christian, but
starting rumors and throwing stones at others, is what gives Christianity a bad
name. She gives Christianity a bad name.
I immediately found a position at a local university as an
assistant professor in nursing. I thought it would be a good change for me and
I would like to teach again. But that didn’t happen. In addition to teaching, I
was expected to be on committees, write grants, do community service and go
back to school for my doctorate. It was more responsibility than I was looking
for. I was hoping to just be a faculty member for a while and not be in charge.
But that didn’t happen. Due to unforeseen events, I got put in charge of the
pediatric course almost immediately. It was overwhelming for me. I had never
taught at the collegiate level and trying to get acclimated to the university
and run a course took its toll on me. I know how to run a course but I had
never taught online and wasn’t familiar with all that went along with it.
Plus at the same time, KK had gotten very ill and was
undergoing lots of testing and treating. I did the best I could with what help
I was given. I did have a few good coworkers who stepped in and helped me. But
it did nothing for my mindset. Then Marley had her hip replacement surgery and
all I could do for the rest of the semester was to just ‘hang on’.
Over the Christmas holidays, my whole personal life changed.
I fell in love with my best friend, Hazel. Life was looking up. The dogs were
happy. Marley and KK were healthy. Life was good.
When the new semester rolled around, I was put in an adult
health nursing course. I had never taught adult health and was given lectures I
was unfamiliar with. I received no help or encouragement. I felt alone and
didn’t want to go to work at all. I was actually called into the office and told I needed to
make more of an effort to come to the lunchroom at noon to eat and talk with my
coworkers. My lunch hour is my lunch hour. I should be able to do what I want
to do during my lunch time. I wanted to spend time at lunch with Hazel when she
wasn’t working. We were in this new relationship and wanted us to go to lunch
together and I just wanted time away from work. I applied for a position in a
DNP program and after an interview, I was accepted. I knew my heart wasn’t in
education anymore and I declined my position in the program.
About this time, my health took a sudden downward spiral. I
became very ill and had to call in sick to work more times than I have called
in my entire time. I was eventually diagnosed with lymphocyctic colitis. It is
an autoimmune disease that is made worse by stress. It is treatable, however I
will be on a steroid for the rest of my life.
I was miserable at work and so wanted to quit my job. But I
needed the insurance. Hazel and I were happy and engaged by now. When the
Supreme Court ruled on marriage equality, we decided to get married early so I
could get on her insurance. We had already planned a private ceremony in
October in Destin on the beach. But on July 1, we went to the Pulaski County
Courthouse and Judge Wendell Griffin married us in his chambers. Everyone in
his office was so nice and open. We celebrated by going to Sam’s and getting
Pupperoni for the girls. J
I gave my notice at the university on July 6. I knew I had
made the right decision when my supervisor replied with “You are putting me in
a bind”. Nothing else. Then my supervisor proceeded to ignore me for the next
two weeks. I did some soul searching during this time and Hospice has always
been in the back of my mind. My mom was on Hospice for a short time and I
remember how sweet the nurses were. A job opening was posted at a local
hospital and I interviewed for it. I got the job!! Throughout this entire
process, Hazel has stood by my side….and believe me, there were a lot of tears
along the way.
I started working at outpatient Hospice and I absolutely
love it. It is so rewarding and is helping me come to terms with my mom’s
death. My coworkers and supervisors are so open and helpful. It’s great to be
part of such an outstanding team where everyone helps each other. I’m settling
in nicely and am enjoying working with patients again.
My life has come full circle. I’m happy in my personal and
professional life. My girls are happy and healthy. I’m looking forward to
October when Hazel and I will recommit to one another and then we will
honeymoon at Animal Kingdom at Disney World. J
